It all started out as a great day.. Harlo went down for her morning nap and woke up in a great mood. I decided that she was happy enough that I would try to squeeze a shower in. She was content so long that I actually got to wash my hair and shave my legs! (a seemingly small novelty that only new moms would appreciate) I got out of the shower, threw on a sundress and began to blow my hair dry when {Dun, dun, dun!} a GIGANTIC millipede scurried across the floor of my bedroom/bathroom area to my nearby shoe rack. I’m not even close to kidding you, this thing was 4 inches long!! I grabbed my baby, who was sitting in her bouncy seat that was on the floor, tried to glance at where the horrific creature went (although I’m not sure what I would have done with it if I had seen it) and ran right out of the room, shoving a towel under the door to lock the creepy crawler out of the rest of our house. {Screaming all the while}
I called my husband who didn’t answer, called my sister, called my mother-in-law and finally Brady called me back

{did I mention that Harlo’s explosive diapering situation has horrible timing and in all of this freaking out, her diaper gave way, leaving her right leg and the front of my dress “pooped”.. Any other item of clothing of mine was in my condemned bedroom}

Me: “BRADY!! I AM FREAKING OUT!! Oh my hell! There is a GIGANTIC MILLIPEDE and it’s locked in our room and I need you to come home because I have wet hair and no shoes and I can’t leave like this!”
Brady: “Wait, what?”
Me: “BRADY!!! A MILLIPEDE!”
Brady: “Cass, it’s okay. I can’t come home right now. You will be fine it can’t hurt you.” {in his most calm voice that he uses when I’m overly hysterical}
Me: “Brady, seriously!! What am I going to do? I can’t go back in there!”
Brady: “Babe, yes you can. It’s okay, just smash it or spray it with bleach or something, you’ll be fine.”
{this is when I hung up on my husband}
I took a deep breath and did what any smart woman and mother would do:

I grabbed Harlo a new dress, wiped the poop off my dress with a baby wipe and promptly left my house with bare feet and half-wet hair. I swiftly drove to my sister’s house to finish getting ready and stayed there until my husband returned home from work.
After all…

what are sisters for?
When we got home, we {and by “we” I mean “he”} searched every inch of our home for the disgusting, terrifyingly ugly “insect” {if you can even call it that! The thing was 4 inches long AT LEAST!} which he failed to find. I then vacuumed every square inch of our living space, we shook out every blanket, towel, bedding, lifted every rug, wiped every surface, shook out every shoe, and lifted every piece of furniture. To no avail but I’m pretty sure we now have the cleanest house on the block.
Seriously though, how freaky is that?! I didn’t even know those things existed in Utah… I’ve lived here for 20 years and have not seen one, has anyone else ever seen one of these things? I hope you haven’t, and hope you never will! My skin is still crawling. Wish me luck sleeping tonight!